Sunday, November 30, 2008

So, it's not so bad...

Just finished my first week of temping, and although it was annoying this weekend to get up early and take it (I take it at 6:30am, and I actually woke up this morning, hit my alarm, but forgot to take the temp, so I didn't take it until 9:30), I got pretty used to it. This might actually work well with my obsessive tracking and organizing actually, it was cool to see the chart and how it works. I'm hoping that it'll be really obvious when the temp drops and then goes up again, so that I won't have to wait 3 months to find out when my most fertile days are, but we'll have to wait and see.

In other news, well, there really isn't any other news. I haven't been thinking about it much lately, have had other things going on, and when life is like that, I tend to forget about all this, the idea of my infertility is really something that's kept in the back of my mind and only emerges about once or twice a month, when something triggers me to think about it. So, until that happens, you won't be hearing much from me.

This is the end goal, though, and I can't forget it:

Some pics of my friend Sara and her little guy Judah. It's been so fun to watch him grow up (he's 9 months now), and so amazing to watch my best friend turn into this wonderful mum, seeing them always makes the itch to have a baby that much stronger.

I wish I could talk to her about my frustrations a bit more though, she knows what's going on but I don't think she knows how to sympathize, and I always make light of it with her to keep it comforatble I guess, but maybe I should talk to her seriously next time, I teared up twice when talking to her last time (the realization that I probably won't have a baby in 2009 is the tear-trigger lately), so I won't be able to keep it light much longer. She got pregnant in a month though, so how can she understand?

Oh, and just to remember, right now "A Song for Sleeping" by the Stone Temple Pilots makes me tear up as well, especially:

"Finally I met you,
The day has come,
You're more than beautiful
And your my son
I don't deserve this
I never thought it could be
Quite like the moment
When you first smiled at me"



1 comment:

Selena said...

Glad to hear you aren't find temping that hard. The reason for the 3 months charting is if your cycles aren't the same length all the time it means your fertle days change too.just to let you know.